Thursday, August 31, 2006
"amidst the rush-hour bustle, I smiled, I blushed just thinking about you"
I miss you
I miss us
What more can I say
{3:35 PM}
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
They tend to keep you as happy as possible
But when time flies,
Your feelings became their least priority
When you met someone new,
They promise to never let you teared
But when time flies,
The tears seem to be your bestfriend
When you met someone new,
Everything revolves around you
But when time flies,
You are almost non-existence.
When you met someone new,
Everything seems to fit in perfectly
But when time flies,
Nothing seem to be right
Now, everybody can promise anybody happiness. But do they really tried their best to keep their word? Or is it like the old "saying" which says, promises are meant to be broken, and that words are just words.
"Happiness is like wind, sometime you don't feel it, but be sure it's always there." (at least that's how I felt)
{11:57 AM}
Sunday, August 27, 2006
I was there from Friday night onwards. And I'm dead beat tired ok. with the helping around, swimming, lack of sleep.
So since you understand how tired I am, can I update another day? With photos and all. Yes yes, photo of Mira's engagement and Khai's pit I shall include as well ok.
For now, I'm so tired of typing cause I have to type more tomorrow (READ: WORK)
So what I'm gonna wear tomorrow huh?
{11:18 PM}
Thursday, August 24, 2006
To the most beautiful, adorable angel - Nayli Insyirah
Happy 1st Birthday...
May you grow up to become a good daughter/grand daughter/niece
May you grow up beautifully..
May you have the most wonderful journey in life. Insya Allah
I love you darling..
{11:53 PM}
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Only God knows how much we miss him. Only God knows how much we longed to hug him, talk to him, kiss his hand.
My dad, he's a good father. Even though he's a very fierce man, but he never laid a single finger on us. He's my father and I very much love him.
The thing that makes me really sad is, I never get to say goodbye to him. None of us were beside him when he took his last breath. I never get to say that I love him and that I truly care for him. I wished I could do all that, just one last time.
But I know it's not possible and I know that he's watching over us. And I know he still love us.
My muslim friends, when you read this, sedekahkan Al-Fatihah untuknya.
"semoga Allah mencucuri rahmat ke atas rohmu" Amin
{10:57 AM}
Sunday, August 20, 2006
I wanted to post her photos, but the laziness sets in and I very malas to edit the photos. Oh well, tomorrow k.. P.R.O.M.I.S.E
But here's a sneak peek of the beautiful lady.. :)
Ok, more pics tomorrow from Mira's engagement to Khai's pit to my lil angel playing ON my computer table.
{11:07 PM}
Saturday, August 19, 2006
So watched Click just now at Cathay. I must say, it is the most sad comedy ever. I cried so hard watching it, until I tersedu-sedu. But there's sure a moral behind that story, it teach us that we must never take those who we love for granted, and that family is everything.
After that was dinner at Plaza Singapura LJS. The chix is getting smaller and smaller ahhh.. soon it'll be the size of the fries sey.. Oh well, at least I felt full after that.
So, it's already 10+ and we head back home. Nice long journey back home.
Tomorrow is someone very very special day. Will update tomorrow ok.. :)
"will you still love me in the morning"
"forever & ever, babe"
{11:50 PM}
Friday, August 18, 2006
It got me thinking cause you see, i do feel the changes in me. I don't know. I felt different now. And I'm pretty sure bf knows it too. My crankiness and my mood swings can change like withing few seconds. And my tolerance level is super low now. And my patience level, it's close to zero.
Sometimse I feel that I want to be alone. Whereas sometime I feel like I want all the attention on me. It's not easy to please me nowadays. I know I've been giving you a hard time. I know you don't deserve to get this kind of treatment from me. And I very well know that you are trying your best to understand me.
For now, I don't know what is happening to me now. I mean, everyday I whine about something that used to make me happy. Everyday I hurt the people who mean the most to me.
I'm sorry i'm giving you a hard time. I'm sorry for all the nonsensical behaviour. I hope it's just a passing by dark clouds that will soon go away. Maybe it's just another phase of life. Dammit.
What we are having is still as special and I hope deep down inside you still feel it too. Cause even though my mouth said the things they are not suppose to say, and my body reacts differently, trust me that deep down in me, and within me, there lies a feeling that can make me smile to myself silly, and that feeling is so true.
I hope you can bear with me a lil while more, and everything will be back to normal.
*hold me tight love, don't ever let me slip. promise me that will you?*
{11:22 AM}
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Emails keep on coming in from my boss. How come when I was away and I asked my cover about my boss workload and they said "nothing" ah? Not fair right. Tsk tsk.
Anyway, one of my boss talked to me yesterday about my position. They gonna move me into a different budget (ok u might not understand what i'm blabbering, but just bear with it ok) So, I asked advise from my "superior", and he said that it won't be any difference from what I am doing now, only that I won't be in the EA pool. Which means if I go on leave or whatever, there's no one to cover me - which is bad. Secondly, in future for my career, it's either I'm stuck at the position I am in now, or just change boss with the same level as the boss i am having now. That means, I won't be assisting anyone with higher rank, or so to say. Now the dilemma lies in, whether I should move to the different budget. I do love working for my current bosses. They are nice and understanding. But for how long right? I need to improve myself.
Ok, so next, I'm planning to take part time course. It's another dilemma between, Interior Deco and Biz Admin. Yes, I know, huge difference isn't it. Both fees are about the same, but i'm more interested in Interior Deco. Haiz, worse come to worse, I don't further my study. Get married then open a child factory. hahahahahahaha. Ok, i'm kidding. I swear I'm kidding ok.
Now, before I get a caught blogging on job, I shall go back and do some work.
*i just remembered, now that I'm almost fully recovered, anyone wanna spank me? hahaha*
{3:38 PM}
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Everytime I ask her to smile, she'll give me this look. Adorable isn't it?
How can I ever take her off my mind, she's like the first person I look forward to when I'm going back from work.
She's turning one this month. Hehe, can't wait to see the princess grow up. Oh, she loves to SCREAM. Girls. haha
{9:54 PM}
You know why i'm feeling this way, cuz I am looking at me and that policeman's pic. And somehow, this mind seem to wander off. About how I first met him - at the auditorium during talentime, our first movie - Shrek 2, our first haircut - around town area, about how he didn't sleep the WHOLE night just to accompany me the next morning for my class - he dun wanna accidentally to wake up late, about how the 10th went - what are we?
Anyways, I can go on and on, but I shall stop. So yeah, me and policeman never start out really well. It was really like one hellavu emotional rollercoaster ride. But we managed to pull it thru. We did walked out of each other lives once, or twice, or thrice, but then somehow, either one of us will "come back". It's like,
"if u love someone, let him/her go, if he/she comes back to you, then it's yours. If not, then it's never meant to be"
Oh well, we gonna be almost 2 years now. And the feelings that I have for him now is sooo much different than wat i used to have for him. Ok, this explains in a good way ok.
He's working right now, I just hope he takes care of himself. Cuz you know, I really miss him.
You don't know? Oh shuddap!
I hope I see him soon. Very soon I hope.
*anyone threw up after reading this entry? just curious. heh*
{12:21 AM}
Monday, August 14, 2006
So far, things going on fine. Lots of catching up to do. Sheesh, feels like first day of work. Imagine not going to work for one month, and suddenly you have like lotsa things to do. Hahaha, my mind finally waking up!
And guess what, i'm missing the policeman very much.
ahh, I should be reading back those emails of mine. And I should be eating my medicine which I very much hate. bahhh~
{2:22 PM}
Sunday, August 13, 2006
So, we went to Suntec to catch a movie. Watched My Super Ex-Girlfriend. Damn funny movie, but Uma Thurman looks so old in that movie. Someone else should take the role, like Jennifer Garner maybe. Anyways, it's a good movie for all you movie cather to watch. Just laugh your heads off ok? =)
After movie, head down to BK to have our dinner. And after dinner was sheeshaing session. Went to Al-Majlis, and ordered mixed fruit sheesha. :) We had so much fun there, laughing and photo taking.
Enjoy the pics ok.
ok, end of photo session. Princess gonna have her royal rest soon cuz this princess isn't rich enough to just bum around at home, and she will be starting to go back to work tomorrow after one month of leave. Damn it, how dreadful!
{11:00 PM}
Saturday, August 12, 2006
Yeah, my date went fine. :) I had so much fun. So we went to watched Fast and Furious, Tokyo Drift. I have only one word - AWESOME. When I got my license, I wanna drive just like that. Hehehehe. And yes, Han is damn freaking hot ok.
After that, we make our way to Marina Bay for the fireworks! Apart from the crowded places (and traffic) the display was splendid. Beautiful. Magnificient. It's much better than last year. So yes, it's been 3 years in a row, we watched the fireworks together.
After the wonderful display by the France, we headed back home. Journey back home was funny with the entertainment from the boys with their blankie. Hehehe.
the oh-so-perfect lunch
"cheese toe" - only WE understand
main higlight - fireworks display by the France
the day ended well. I enjoyed my day, and I hope you do too.
{11:58 PM}
Friday, August 11, 2006
Anyway, today I went for my medical check up. Both of my wound is growing so well. Alhamdullilah. But only the new one, the doc said that the surrounding tissue is still hard. So I have to take more medication and he will see if it's still hard in weeks to come. And doc also mention to me about my low blood count. Doc suspect i'm having Thalassemia. But it's not confirmed yet. Maybe in 2 weeks time then I get the results. So anyway, after my check up had a good lunch with Kak Yan. We ate at Qiji. Yummy! We talked about many2 things. Hehehe. It was fun.. Hope to have another lunch with her soon. :)
So, in the evening, met up with the bf. Accompany him to the doc, and after that we went to watch fireworks! hehehe. No no, we didn't go marina bay or anywhere which is crowded. We went somewhere in Pasir Ris where it was clear (but far) and just the 2 of us. Hehe. Even though from a distance, I could see the beauty of the fireworks. So tomorrow I shall go there. And snap photos ok? Hehe.
Oh gosh, i feel so dread going to work. Helpppppp!
{11:16 PM}
Thursday, August 10, 2006
After filling our stomach up, we went to TM/century square cuz Aqil wanna get his school shoes. Bah, already the last quarter still want to buy new shoes. I don't understand that boy lah. So yeah, after that, we went home and I had a very nice afternoon nap.
Then woke up just in time for NDP! This year's perf is like so nice like that ey? And oooh, the men in uniform, so gorgeous! I wished bf was there wearing the number 1. :) oh well, den wen it's time for firewords, me and aqil rushed to 13th floor. And surprisingly, we could see the fireworks oh so clearly there! It was nice lah!!! I wanna go watch again this weekend!!
Ok now, all you loves out there, hope you had a great holiday! It'll be quite some time for the next one. Good nite
{12:30 AM}
How wonderful my life with you,
It's beyond explanation,
But what I felt in me,
Is definitely true
All those ups and downs,
Shape us to what we are now,
No one gonna stand in our way of love,
Cause we are stronger than before
I thank you for all those times,
It's been marvelous,
For my life has been close to perfect,
And all the reason, is you.
To my dear, Happy 22nd mth to us. Happy 10th once again. I love you dear.
{12:17 AM}
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
So we walked around Bugis, had KFC for late lunch, went window-shopping. Couldn't find any nice trousers/skirts/shoes. damn. BUT, dear bought for me the dress from Frontieer! The one i've been aiming for which cost $69! Weeee.. I'll be getting it end of the mth cuz they have to order it from Spain. :) Thanks dear!
So after Bugis, we went to national library. Found a new chill-out spot at the Canopy. It's very peaceful. I like.
After library, we head down to Fullerton area for fireworks!! I was so excited, but someone had to spoil my day. There's this chinese lady who brought her dog at that very crowded places. And honestly I had a huge phobia with dogs, and Muslim can't touch dog either when it's wet. So yeah, I was giving her a lour comment bout how annoying she is. And she answered back to my comment. Ok, I was damn frustrated and so we started to exchange words in a harsh way. I couldn't control my anger, and let out a loud "BITCH". That's when she started to shout at me like a crazy person. Damn, and she put down her dog. I was very scared ok. I almost wanted to kick that dog away. So after some dispute, I walked off. And just nice, the fireworks started.
It's a nice show. But a little messy I must say. And I didn't enjoy it that much cuz that "women" spoilt my whole mood! Dammit.
But at least, dear's there to put a smile back to my face!
Thanks dear for the gift and the day out! hearts u.
{11:13 PM}
So, went for our mini shopping for his mom's prezzie. We got for her a $50 Metro Voucher and a watch. =) I was so worried that she might not like the watch, cuz it's a lil bit simple for my taste. Haha. (tak kan lah nak belikan makcik arty farty nyer kannn? lol)
Then at bout 11pm just now, received a call from Makcik saying thank you for the gifts and she likes it. :) Phew.
Ok backtrack for a lil while... I gave a wonderful suprised to dear this morning, or rather noon when I fetched him from work. I didn't give him any clue at all I was going to fetch him. So I was there after I went for my dressing which was about 11.45am, and dear officially finished work at bout 1pm. Haha. It was hot, and I was tired of waiting BUT, it was worthwhile when I saw that smile on his face which came together with a peck on the cheek. *blushes* oh well, I hope I do make him feel better.
Alright then, it's getting late. I'm sleepy. Sleep tight loves.
{12:01 AM}
Sunday, August 06, 2006
My first ever flea market was superb! The whole experience was very interesting indeed (even though I went MIA most of the time *winks*). So I managed to sell away my bears for $10. And I bought for myself a Levi's Tee worth $8, a ring + pair of earring worth $10, and another ring worth $3. So you do u think I earn? hahaha. I bought more things than wat I sell.
I don't mind having a space again whenever there's a flea market. =)
***
On a different note, I love this part of the line from Jason Mraz song - Life is Wonderful
"And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
And it takes some fears to make you trust"
True indeed, no?
**A note to him, i hope I cheer you up somehow.
{11:26 PM}
Friday, August 04, 2006
year month. And it's due to same thing as before! How "nice". It's honestly depressing to know that my body is still not feeling well. Well, the doc said it is because of bacteria infection. oh wtf. and doc found out too that I have a low blood count, 9.6 for me and 12-16 for normal.
Oh well, my op day was on thursday morning about 10am. I woke up at about 11.30. And yes, dear was there yet again WITH a pink rose. =) I'm touched by the fact that he's just finished his night shift and he straight went to hosp to be by my side.
talking bout dear, he's been chilling out at my place quite often now. He was here last Wed and we played the xbox, surfed on the net, msn-ing. =) *smilez*
Anyway, back to my Thurs, dear went home about 2pm, but came back later in the day with his entourage. Hehe. Him mum, dad and kak yan came to visit me too! Sweet isn't it. ;) And Kak Yan showed me her scan photo of jr. I bet it's a SHE. hahaha. Couldn't see her/his gender yet cuz in the scan photo she/he was curling and covered her/his lil thingy. Hehe.
And later on thursday night, my siblings came. Had our usual talks and stuff and after they went back home, i straight away knocked out. Heh.
Ohh, my bosses send me flowers, with a note saying for me to come back soon cuz their life is chaotic. :) hehehe. these are the reason why i love my job. And my "cumi-cumi" club gave me a flower too.
Oh well, there's an annoucement to make:
On Sun, Aug 06 afternoon, me and my sis will be having a flea market at Pasir Ris Blk 104. Do come and take a look.
till then, take care
{7:24 PM}
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
well, life for me have been really rough. My wound is getting better BUT there's another 3 absesses growing. 2 small ones, and 1 big one. The nurse told me that, if the antibiotics dun work for the big absess, i need to go thru another surgery. dammit! having plasters at my thighs is not comfortable at all. The nurse said, the 3 "newborn" might be infected by the "king". Or maybe my blood is "dirty" or something like that.
I dun undertstand, having all these things is really creeping me out. Making me lose my patience and all. Making me scared of myself sometime.
Honestly, things btwn me and bf not is kinda rough too and i'm not ashamed to say it. I mean, I always write those beautiful things bout me and him and making it so perfect without any flaws. But tell me now, which relationship dun haf their arguments and misunderstanding. And I believe that behind all that arguments, tears i know there lies a stronger us.
Sometime I just close my eyes, and think of living my life without him, I just cried. I know I love him like a whole lot. We gonna be almost 2 yrs now. Time flies huh? I'm holding on to this love. I will.
Oh well, I just hope everything goes back to normal. My body going back to its own stable condition. Me and bf going thru our rough patches like real adult.
But one thing that I'm thankful of, is seeing my lil angel grow. She's gonna be 1 year soon. Wonderful isn't it? :)
{10:07 PM}